[ his jaw tightens, seeing it, a little wobble to his chin briefly before he very, very carefully folds it again and puts it down where he won't crumple it or lose it. she was just a kid, one that was obviously deeply hurt in some way. and he doesn't even know how she died yet. ]
It... [ a laugh leaves him, humorless, just this side of wet. ] It's not fine. It isn't. This place is such a screwed up joke.
I'll be okay, because I have to be - but what about Whisper? What about the captain? I promised Whisper I'd look out for her. She was terrified after last week's trial, of losing her team, of losing her friends, and now -
Hate this too. Feels like no matter what we do, we're stuck in this fucking nightmare. We might keep getting information, but it just kind of cements home how shit the situation is.
[ better than last trial. ideally. she hopes. her fingers curl into her palm as she pulls her hand away and nods. because god if last week wasn't awful... at least there were no cages involved this week. ]
Going to sleep and knowing that you're gonna wake up and someone'll be gone.
[ every week it hits closer and closer and she hates this. her jaw tightens, working itself over as she tries to find the words, but really can't. this week blows. why are we so misogynistic???? ]
[ eyes lifting up from the cup in his hand, hung looks at her for a moment, seeing the fist that she makes. it all feels - hopeless. like they really are just doomed to keep seeing the people they grow close to get picked off, one by one, by more of their friends. what are they going to do, if it turns out that whisper was so brutally killed by someone they care about? what are they doing to do, if someone they'd been laughing with left janeway? ]
And it doesn't even point us towards a definite answer. Not right now, anyways.
[ he sets his drink down, reaching to take her fist and carefully coax it into unfurling. your heart is a muscle the size of your fist, he thinks, and brings her hand to bump her knuckles into his chest. ]
[ she looks like she doesn't expect the touch and as soon as her hand is brought to his chest, she turns her head. her fingers are loose now, and jolyne fixes her eyes for a moment on her own fingers, a point where a hole-like scar sits on her index finger. power. what's it like to have power again? not this one she has this week. not the ability to fly. she wants her soul again. she could do anything with her soul.
her own lip trembles for a moment before she sets her jaw once more. ]
No one points us in any direction, we've had to fuckin' fight tooth and claw for some semblence of any kinda answer.
I miss being able to punch all my fuckin' problems away.
[ well, she's just going to get drawn into a hug, now. as close as she wants to be, or as brief as she wants. or, even, as long as she wants, if she needs it like he does. janeway didn't make any friends, last trial, ruffling feathers the way she did - and her tricorder wouldn't be good to keep in circulation if someone wanted to get creative with a murder.
but whisper was just a kid. she was just a scared kid, who cared about her friends and was afraid of losing her team (again, she'd said). and he'd promised - and he couldn't keep a promise, this time. ]
... god, I wish we could just punch these problems away. [ a shaky breath, a weak laugh ] Instead we're playing scavenger hunt while we get thrown into stupid or deadly situations we didn't ask for.
well the hug is allowed, she just melts into it and push her cup onto a nearby nightstand before wrapping her arms around him too, pressing them together. the hug she gives him is as tight as possible, fingers curling into his fur as she fights to press her chin onto his shoulder. ]
Just have to keep at it. We've made it halfway... we can manage four more weeks.
[ we can manage it just fine. she turns her head a little so she can look at him with a faint smile. ]
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It... [ a laugh leaves him, humorless, just this side of wet. ] It's not fine. It isn't. This place is such a screwed up joke.
I'll be okay, because I have to be - but what about Whisper? What about the captain? I promised Whisper I'd look out for her. She was terrified after last week's trial, of losing her team, of losing her friends, and now -
I hate this, for all of us.
no subject
[ better than last trial. ideally. she hopes. her fingers curl into her palm as she pulls her hand away and nods. because god if last week wasn't awful... at least there were no cages involved this week. ]
Going to sleep and knowing that you're gonna wake up and someone'll be gone.
[ every week it hits closer and closer and she hates this. her jaw tightens, working itself over as she tries to find the words, but really can't. this week blows. why are we so misogynistic???? ]
no subject
And it doesn't even point us towards a definite answer. Not right now, anyways.
[ he sets his drink down, reaching to take her fist and carefully coax it into unfurling. your heart is a muscle the size of your fist, he thinks, and brings her hand to bump her knuckles into his chest. ]
no subject
her own lip trembles for a moment before she sets her jaw once more. ]
No one points us in any direction, we've had to fuckin' fight tooth and claw for some semblence of any kinda answer.
I miss being able to punch all my fuckin' problems away.
no subject
but whisper was just a kid. she was just a scared kid, who cared about her friends and was afraid of losing her team (again, she'd said). and he'd promised - and he couldn't keep a promise, this time. ]
... god, I wish we could just punch these problems away. [ a shaky breath, a weak laugh ] Instead we're playing scavenger hunt while we get thrown into stupid or deadly situations we didn't ask for.
no subject
well the hug is allowed, she just melts into it and push her cup onto a nearby nightstand before wrapping her arms around him too, pressing them together. the hug she gives him is as tight as possible, fingers curling into his fur as she fights to press her chin onto his shoulder. ]
Just have to keep at it. We've made it halfway... we can manage four more weeks.
[ we can manage it just fine. she turns her head a little so she can look at him with a faint smile. ]
Yeah? Together?